Tag Archives: Future

Fix Yourself

About Lyrics, , , , ,

I wrote Reassemble Me based on a thought I had late one night. If only I came with instructions. Sometimes broken people have triggers that you can’t avoid without already knowing where they are. This can make you want to fix these broken people, to keep from hurting them, but that’s only temporary.

We need to fix ourselves, to learn how strong we are and how to pick ourselves back up after falling so far down. Being there for us might keep us from falling further, might make us feel better for a little while, but all that goes the moment you’re gone.

Sometimes you won’t even know you’ve landed a broken one until it’s too late to back out. Some of us have learned to hide it well, even keeping little triggers a secret so people won’t see the mess below the surface.

We can seem cool calm and collected and then one day you accidentally step on a land mine and….. Bang! I don’t envy those people. It’s not exactly what they bargained for, but at least you know that those that stick around are probably keepers. And now you have a new reason to fix yourself. If not for you, then for the person who loves you enough to stick by you through the bad days.

Always Keep Fighting.

Love
Roxanne

Enjoy Life

About Lyrics, , , , , , ,

Nothing But Time is about how everyone is always so focused on the little things in life, like work, bills and taxes, that they forget to actually enjoy it. Excluding accidents and illnesses, we’re all on this Earth for a long time and some of us spend our entire lives without truly living.

We were not born just to work until we die. We should continue learning and growing right up until the end. That’s my plan. I work to pay for my holidays to experience more of the world.

Living in Australia means you grow up kind of isolated from every other country and most people never leave the part of Australia they grew up in. I refuse to be one of those people. I have been to 16 different countries so far and I have a plan to make 30.

I have grown more and learnt more from traveling to see those countries than probably through all those years of school. I done more things, faced more fears, than I thought I ever would and I feel that I have truly lived.

Life is not only about marriage, a house and kids. We should explore more and learn more about other people and cultures so that when we do settle down, we have more to teach our kids about the world.

The point is we shouldn’t live each day for a future that may never happen. Enjoy yourselves. Enjoy life.

Love
Roxanne

Nothing But Time

Lyrics, , , , , ,

I want to get out
Let’s plan our escape
We can leave this town
And run from our fate
Follow the sunset
Leave it all behind
It’s time now to reset
Relax and unwind

Take the hands off the clock
We’ve got nothing but time
No road maps to follow
Only mountains to climb
Stop and steal the roses
Because it’s not a crime
To wander off this path
We’ve got nothing but time

Take in the bright lights
Cities that never sleep
We can spend our lives
Living out our dreams
So follow your heart
Make new memories
Forget what has past
This is our journey

Take the hands off the clock
We’ve got nothing but time
No road maps to follow
Only mountains to climb
Stop and steal the roses
Because it’s not a crime
To wander off this path
We’ve got nothing but time

Run to the horizon
We can get away
It’s time to live bigger
What’s standing in our way
Run to the horizon
Escape yesterday
There’s only tomorrow
So let’s start today

Take the hands off the clock
We’ve got nothing but time
No road maps to follow
Only mountains to climb
Stop and steal the roses
Because it’s not a crime
To wander off this path
We’ve got nothing but time

Love
Roxanne

What To Do Next

About Lyrics, ,

Box of Feelings was written on a train to an over night bus to Zagreb, Croatia. I was nearing the end of my Europe trip and thinking about what to do next. This was my second Europe trip and other than the fact that I’ve seen more countries than I had last year, I’m in the exact same place that I was.

I have a plan, but it’s too long-term. It’s not something I can achieve any time soon and in order to survive until then I need a short-term plan. I didn’t have the long-term plan when I came back from my trip last year, so I suppose something is different from last year.

My long-term plan is to write songs and sell them, either with someone else’s name on it and with my own. That had been my dream that I kept a secret, even from myself, for years, and even though it’s still the plan I feel like I’m putting it on the back burner. I feel like I’m starting to hide from it again. Like I’m afraid to fail again and it’s keeping that dream on a leash.

That’s what these lyrics are about. With no real plan in sight I wasn’t looking forward to coming home to the dreams I was running from.

But now I have a short-term plan and thinking more about my long-term plan. I just hope it works out.

Love
Roxanne

Wasted Life

About Lyrics, ,

Eighteen as you might have guessed, if you read it, was written about my life at the age of 18. I had just finished school and was supposed to be deciding what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. Of course, since the only thing I’d ever really wanted to do was write songs and perform them but I thought that particular profession was way out of my reach, so I had nothing.

Apparently, me without plans is not a good combination. I sat on the couch all day while my friends had work or university, just waiting until they were done for the day. Or, more importantly, waiting for Friday night so we could go out, despite my lack of funds, and get completely wasted.

I’m serious. One time, we went out and I only had $5 on me. I got the most drunk I had ever been and had MacDonald’s as an after drinking snack. I still came home with my $5.

That may sound like I’m bragging, but I’m not. I woke up the next morning so sick, I was throwing up all day. I also managed to make out with my friends older brother and break one of my favourite shoes.

The worst thing about that night, though, was that I ditched one of my other friends to go out drinking. She didn’t speak to me for like a week afterwards. My need to go out and prove that I had something going on in my life nearly cost me a friend, and maybe my liver.

But I didn’t stop there. I continued going off and getting drunk almost every week. And subsequently spending almost every Saturday lying very still and trying not to throw up. One time I think I even had alcohol poisoning. My sister found me outside, on my back and thought I was dead.

This continued even after I golf a job, because I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to do. The only thing I wanted to do, I thought it was a fantasy and I could not think of a single other thing that I wanted, so those Friday nights were all I had to look forward to every week.

How sad is that? I refused to try for what I wanted and wasted years of my life being bored and wasted.

Love
Roxanne

The Day I Was Sent To The School Councillor

About Lyrics,

Unclear was written when I was in year 9. It’s basically about how I wanted to be done with high school and just skip to the part where I was happily married with a job I loved, and I baby on the way.

I didn’t like not knowing what the future would hold or what I wanted to do in life. But then, I realised, that skipping ahead means you miss all the fun you can have while you’re young and you miss out on a lot of opportunities.

When I wrote this, I pasted it in the front of my school diary, kind of like I do now, except it was a lot less public. My year advisor saw it one day, probably while giving me a detention for not having my hair up, and he found it distressing.

I don’t know why, it’s probably one of the least depressing lyrics I’ve written. After having a chat to me about whether I was ok, he then sent me to see the school councillor. I then had to explain to the councillor that writing helps to let out any emotions I have that are keeping me down.

If only that year advisor could see some of the stuff I write now.

Love
Roxanne

Unclear

Lyrics, ,

I found some old lyrics that I wrote when I was much younger. I thought I’d share them with you.

I hate not knowing
Where I’ll be
Ten years from now
It’s an untold story

Today I cannot see
What the future holds
It’s all unclear
Not written in bold

What comes next
Where to from here
It’s all one big question
And the answers I fear

Today I cannot see
What the future holds
It’s all unclear
Not written in bold

If I could skip ahead
I wouldn’t miss a beat
All the places I’d go
All the people I’d meet

Today I cannot see
What the future holds
It’s all unclear
Not written in bold

I hate my life
I hate where I am
I wish to go back
And do it all again

Today I cannot see
What happened to my past
And all those good times
They went by so fast

Love
Roxanne

I Hoped

About Lyrics,

Ok so, I promised myself I’d be honest on here and I want to keep that promise, but first I have to say this. If any relatives of mine are reading this, Mum, Dad, Nan? Please stop. This is not a story for you.

…

Turn back now.

…

Do not keep reading

…

‘The Life That I Lost’ you might have guessed (if you even read it, did you?) is about a time when I had a slight pregnancy scare. I was many weeks late and starting to get worried, so I told my friends. They then thought it would be hilarious to freak me out. They started saying things to make it seem more real, like ‘What do you think it is?’ or ‘What are you going to name it?’

Those type of questions don’t freak me out because I’ve already thought of names and that I want to have a boy first and then a girl. I feel like girls end up more outgoing if they grew up with an older brother, but that could just be because I have an older sister and am not so outgoing.

Then my friends started asking me other, harder questions, ones that take thought. ‘Who gets the baby if you die?’ ‘Will you tell the father?’ (he wasn’t exactly someone I see often *cough* one night stand *cough*) You know, the usual drunken conversations had between friends on a night out.

I should add that I didn’t think I was pregnant, we used protection, but the idea of having a baby suddenly seemed perfect. I started planning everything out. I probably should have just taken a test but I like I said, I didn’t actually think I was pregnant, but after that night I hoped I was.

A few nights later, accompanied by my friends, I took a test, three tests to be more accurate, and they were all negative. I kept hoping I did it wrong, I’d never taken one before being only 19 at the time, so I thought maybe I’m doing this wrong.

But nope. 9 months later, or 7 months since I took the test like 2 months later, and there was no baby shooting out me, no me screaming in pain.

I still have dreams where I’ve had a baby and I’m so happy in the dream. Then I wake up and it hits me that I don’t have a baby. One time I had a dream that I had twins and they were in another room asleep, the I woke up in a panic because I couldn’t hear if they were crying or not. Took me almost a minute to remember.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad I wasn’t pregnant. I wasn’t ready to be a mother. I had barely seen and done half the things I’ve seen and done now. There’s so much more I want to do before I have kids. One of those things is to actually be in love and married before I have kids. Or at least in love.

So that’s what ‘The Life That I Lost’ is about. The time I planned out a life that never ended up happening because I wasn’t pregnant.

Love
Roxanne

The Life That I Lost

Lyrics, , ,

I’d been afraid to dream
Afraid to hope.
But I’d begun to plan
And now I can’t cope.
I could see it all
The car seat and the pram
Once I had started
It flowed like a dam

My new life was right there
And I was excited
I didn’t want to hope
But I couldn’t fight it
I could picture it clearly
And look what that cost
Because now it’s all gone
The life that I lost

I didn’t want to
But they made me.
I planned out a future
For me and my baby
It would go to a good school
Have some good friends
With me and the kid
The fun never ends

My new life was right there
And I was excited
I didn’t want to hope
But I couldn’t fight it
I could picture it clearly
And look what that cost
Because now it’s all gone
The life that I lost

It was all right there
A future I wanted.
I could reach out and touch it
But now, by it, I’m haunted.
I can still see it
Even to this day
But it never happened
It was taken away

My new life was right there
And I was excited
I didn’t want to hope
But I couldn’t fight it
I could picture it clearly
And look what that cost
Because now it’s all gone
The life that I lost

There was one thing I needed.
For the life I wanted to live.
But I took the test.
And it was negative.

My new life was right there
And I was excited
I didn’t want to hope
But I couldn’t fight it
I could picture it clearly
And look what that cost
Because now it’s all gone
The life that I lost

Love
Roxanne